Hello from Matakana at the bottom of the world.
A bit of a navel-gazing, inward-looking post from me today. I’m very aware that my website needs a bit of an overhaul. An update, if you will. I know it’s been a wee while coming. To be honest, I simply HAVEn’T BEEN feeling it. And I didn’t know what the future would bring.
I’ve been ruminating and chewing my cud and considering what I should (or could) do with joannafrankham.com for a bit, now. It’s quite a lot. And I still don’t really have an answer for you. Or, for me, for that matter. But I’m choosing to take a leap without really knowing where I’m going.
What I do know:
- I know my years of AIP mentoring and coaching brought such richness and opportunity to my life. It taught me much about creating space to make choices that serve me and trusting my gut. After doing the work to heal it, that is! It connected me with a #bloodyfabulous bunch of (mostly) women from around the globe. I continue to treasure this.
- I feel that my time as an AIP Mentor and coach has come to a natural end. I know I’m not in the zone for coaching at this moment in time. This may change. But it may not, too. It’s time to take a little advice from Janis Joplin…
- I know I have a significant back catalogue of AIP-related resources that resonate for quite a few. The blog traffic tells me. So, I need to have a repository for that. And I will.
- I know that I enjoy the process of writing and sharing when I feel I have something to say. And I love the connection this brings with others.
- I know that my monthly Stuff & Nonsense newsletter has a loyal following of #bloodyfabulous people. It’s still about life stuff from a reasonably health-conscious and slightly irreverent 50-something woman who’s moved home to New Zealand after a very long time away. Less AIP. More finding my groove again. And I am grateful for this medium. It brings me joy. And I absolutely love the emails I receive from my In-Betweeners (what my subscribers are called, for the uninitiated).
- I know that I have a love/hate relationship with social media. At the moment, the stuff I struggle with is outweighing the stuff I love about it.
- And I know from experience that action definitely precedes motivation for me. So does starting before I’m ready to jump. In this case, that gives me the faith to begin something before I know what the end looks like. I know it will evolve, and that is enough.
Keeping up with the Joneses.
My move to New Zealand in the middle of a pandemic was big. Much bigger than I anticipated at the time. Many, many things went awry. In all my life, I don’t think I’ve ever had such a stressful year. So I took some time off-line as I started to navigate my new life.
Quite some time. And it was good.
As I settled into my new life and began to implement new rituals, I could literally feel my crazy-high stress levels start to come down. And I missed my tribe. After a longish break off the socials, I began posting again – regularly on Facebook and semi-regularly on Insta’. But, despite reconnecting with many of my lovely crew, I also felt the dissonance that social media brings me – the comparisonitis, the doom scrolling, the FOMO, the constant need to check-in. Not to mention the time wasted.
Because that’s what social media is like. And that stuff doesn’t make me feel good. Rather, it makes me feel as though I am not enough. It’s an unpleasant feeling.
I’ve been thinking about hitting pause (again) on my socials for a bit now. It’s a smidge complicated. Mainly because I have some wonderful online and long-distance friendships that are maintained via Facebook. What happens to them if I disappear?
I remember reading something Sarah Wilson wrote, a very long time ago, about how when she received three nudges from the universe, she always listened.
And guess what? The universe has messaged me. Three times.
First, with this article on giving up social media by Philippa Moore in The Guardian. One year on, and Philippa found she had more energy. She was sleeping better. She felt more creative and confident. Her fear of missing out had disappeared. Pretty compelling. Similar to how I felt when I took a break, in fact.
Second, a James Clear quote that really resonated landed in my inbox: “The best way to change the world is in concentric circles: start with yourself and work your way out from there.” I strongly identify with this concept. And I am an ongoing work-in-progress at living with intention. Perhaps James has articulated a new (better?) way of the old adage to ‘lead by example’! If social media doesn’t make me feel good, why do I do it? Perhaps taking some time away will encourage me to find alternative ways to connect…
And third, a friend recommended I read Jaron Lanier’s, Ten Arguments For Deleting Your Social Media Accounts Right Now. It’s a slightly scary read from a Silicon Valley scientist. The bit that really hit home for me was his chapter on behaviour modification. Lanier suggests that social networks are intentionally designed to be addictive, inducing a Pavlovian reaction in users. We share content and anticipate positive feedback, leading us to repeat similar posts. When we receive negative feedback, we adjust our behaviour to improve the outcomes. It’s one of those truths you know, but you don’t know you know, isn’t it?
I do not like this, Sam-I-am. Not one bit.
As a result of all of this, I’m hitting the snooze button on my social media accounts. Again. I’m not deleting them. Yet. Rather, I’m going radio silent and removing the apps from my phone. I won’t be checking in. For six months. As a kind of experiment, if you like.
The next iteration…
What I will be doing is continuing my newsletters. These are monthly at the moment. They may end up being more frequent. Maybe not, too. We shall see. If you’d like to join my #bloodyfabulous crew by signing up, I’d love to have you. Here’s the link.
My Stuff & Nonsense newsletter is the best way to stay in touch with me. And stay in the loop with all the shenanigans and goings on.
I want to (hope to?) dedicate some of the time I anticipate saving off the socials by reconnecting with my blog. I’m not sure it will exactly be a bonanza (as suggested above!), but I do like that word. Nor do I have a crystal clear vision of the direction I’m headed. My wonderful In Betweeners recently responded to my request for information from them on what they want – broadly, it was ‘more of the same sort of content’. If you have any suggestions of your own, feel free to drop me a line.
What this does mean is committing a good bit of time to tidying up the evolution of my website from Joanna Frankham Coaching to Joanna Frankham – Stuff & Nonsense. I ask you to please bear with me as that shift occurs. I’m in no way a technical whizz-kid, and that shizzle takes time! For some reason, I feel like it takes me longer than it does for most…
Anywho – that’s where I’m at. Less social media. More intention. Onwards!